What to say to a woman
One of the most COMMON questions that I get in my email inbox everyday:
“When I see a woman I’d like to approach, what do I SAY to her?”
I get this question at least a DOZEN times a week. So I know this must be something on a lot of guys’ minds.
Now, I AM going to answer this question, but I MUST say FIRST that USUALLY this question wrongfully ASSUMES that the most important thing is what you SAY, rather than how you say it.
ALSO, it wrongfully assumes that you must start off your interaction with some GLORIOUS awesome comment, as if it will cause the clouds to part and lightning to burst forth from the heavens and the girl will just be mesmerized from the first INSTANT.
The truth is, that your pickup CAN pick up steam and be successful even if the first words you uttered were not all that awesome. Sometimes a guy stumbles a bit at the beginning, then finds his groove as he goes on.
Ok, now that that is clear, here are some tips on the ever popular “What do I SAY to her????” topic:
ONE:
DO NOT BEGIN WITH QUESTIONS, ESPECIALLY LAME ONES!
The problem with starting an interaction with a question, is that you have given her NOTHING
and you are trying to make her give you SOMETHING,i.e. an ANSWER!
You have to give her SOMETHING, whether it is the gift of LAUGHTER, of INTRIGUE, of your general good vibes, or any of about a billion other things.
But if you just go in there with a question, she feels NOTHING from you, and yet she feels she is supposed to GIVE to you.
So of course, she will try to get the interaction OVER with as soon as possible, since she is getting nothing from it.
TWO:
YOU CAN ALSO USE THE NON “REAL” QUESTION OPENER
Now, sometimes you can begin with a question when you ALREADY know you are going to have a REPLY to her answer that WILL create an emotionally positive impact.
So for example, if you are asking for directions, and you know you are going to tease her playfully on the directions she gave you, and you know she is going to laugh, then ultimately this is still a GIVING type of interaction from you, rather than a TAKING one.
Another distinction to remember on this concept is that sometimes you can be INITIALLY seeming to be asking a question, when really you are NOT asking a question, and actually you are MAKING AN INTERESTING STATEMENT.
So for example, let’s say you go up to a woman and you tell her that you wanted to know if you
could get her opinion on something.
So that might SEEM like a question, but it’s not, as long as you IMMEDIATELY proceed to tell her an interesting STORY about something that happened to you or that happened to someone else, i.e. let’s say you go up to her and say you wanted her opinion on something, and she says “ok”, and then you start telling her something interesting that you read, or saw, or experienced yourself. (And if you just start paying attention, you will notice that there are TONS of interesting things going on all the time.) It could be anything from celebrity gossip,
to profound thoughts. Just keep it INTERESTING.
And then AFTER this story, you ask her opinion on a question you had about it, well then here what you really did was GIVE before TAKING.
By TELLING THE STORY FIRST, in reality it is YOU who is giving HER something FIRST.
The only reason why you even mentioned the “asking for her opinion” is because asking for an opinion comes across as a very non-threatening way to BEGIN an interaction.
THREE:
SIT DOWN RIGHT NOW AND PREPARE SOME BASIC THEMES FOR SITUATIONS THAT YOU KEEP RUNNING INTO.
As you know, I am a HUGE proponent of developing your natural instincts in this whole arena of attraction and dating success. So it’s really important to me that guys are able to get OFF the “dating training wheels” as soon as possible rather.
So, instead of SCRIPTING out what you are going to say, like some beginners do, I suggest that instead you just come up with some basic THEMES that you can fall back on, just in case you start to get anxious and aren’t able to get into the right state of mind.
So, for example, let’s say you often find yourself waiting in line at the post office or bank. You can come up with some humorous themes that will work in these situations. i.e. At the bank, in those long line-ups, you can say to the woman in front or behind you “hey, by the time I get to the teller, my money will have tripled just from the interest”.
Or you can playfully tell her that if she joins you to rob the bank, you’ll split the cash. Careful on this one, make sure it’s CLEAR you are being playful!
Or if it’s a long line anywhere, or a long wait anywhere, you can go up to a woman and ask her if she has some “light” reading material, like the entire Encyclopedia Britannica for the long wait! Then, if she tells you that she wishes she did, but that she doesn’t, you can tease her that it’s okay if she doesn’t know how to read.
And that’s just using the humor angle, you can do it without teasing as well. For example, on a long wait on a crowded line, where everyone is being silent, and doing nothing, you can comment to her, that if we were able to productively use all this time that we were in lines doing NOTHING, we could probably all win Nobel prizes.
And that could lead to an interesting discussion of making the most of our lives, etc.
As you get to the more advanced levels of MASTERY, you will learn how to have kick-ass interactions without having ANYTHING memorized at ALL. But for starting out, this stuff is a great way to begin.
FOUR:
WHEN SHE SPEAKS, LISTEN VERY, VERY WELL.
It’s important to realize that there is a human being on the other side, that this is not just about you doing some “show”, where the other person after you are finished then clicks “yes” or “no”.
Rather, an effective conversation goes back and forth, where you are both getting closer and closer to understanding each other, and learning from each other, even in a brief conversation.
So don’t get all caught up on trying to put on a show, or you will be missing all the stuff she is giving to YOU, and if you miss the stuff she is saying to you, your communication back with her is going to suck, and she will KNOW and FEEL this.
And if you are reading this right now, I assure you that all this stuff is the TIP OF THE ICEBERG. There is so much MORE I want to show you, from how to BEGIN the interaction, to how to take things all the way to a physical level, and how to BUILD the connection to a level
that 99.99 percent of people will NEVER have.
As awesome as pick-up might seem, believe it or not, it’s NOTHING compared to the levels of wisdom and development you must attain to go BEYOND the initial pick up and to KEEP THINGS PROGRESSING further and further to ever higher levels with a woman, especially a woman of QUALITY, inside and out.
If you want to learn both pick-up AND all these other CRUCIAL AREAS OF DATING SUCCESS as well, you owe it to yourself to get my MASTERY PROGRAM.
This program will show you in EXPLICIT and CLEAR DETAIL everything you need to know about picking up a woman ANYWHERE, and it will ALSO show you how to KEEP that attraction burning STRONG, IN A WAY THAT DOES NOT REQUIRE YOU TO “ACT”.
Follow the links on the right and get the info you need to dial your dating into high gear now!